Success motivates me to be more vigilant

Yes, to be more vigilant than ever...that's what I am struggling with at this time. Last week's opening of the class had me anxiously finding my time with the Lord, and since we're talking high-pressure fourth year workpile versus spirituality...it's unquestionably hard for me, who's still trying so hard to keep her sights on eternity in check over anything else.

But I am determined!!! I refuse to fall back and get stuck in the pit of meaningless existence. I refuse to be in a stagnant relationship with God. I refuse to be in that position wherein my morals are out of the window. I refuse to lose my sight of what is right in the highest standards- God's.

I admit my weakness in the face of being tempted to 'just forget about God for a while and chat with my friends/ play dota/ do nothing/ sleep.' After all, it's been quite a while since I've spent time with my college friends, dota seems like a fun game, and sleeping is just...heaven? Hehehe. It is. The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak nga talaga.

Indeed, there is no harm in having fun, as God wants us to be happy and enjoy his gifts. But these should not hinder me from finding my time for him.

Kaya nga ako'y napaparaning sa kakagawa ng paraan!!! Gusto ko ng fun fun, but not too much that I neglect my spiritual growth! It's happened quite a lot in the previous year. I don't want it to happen again. It's enough sadness and loneliness...mistakes...ungrace. It's ugly. It's what comes with my life away from the Lord who knows best.

Thankfully, I had been able to keep up with the reading and praying. So far. :) Thank God for that. But this feel of success at its early stage should not make me relax. I have to be vigilant, more than ever. Sabi nga ni Christ sa mga apostles niya sa garden...'keep watch and pray that you may not fall into temptation.'

Keep watch. Be vigilant. Temptation is everywhere. I am facing them all the more. God help me.