I miss writing. In general. Not minding whether it's for an audience or for myself. But it helps to know that in writing for an audience, one has to follow certain patterns in order to deliver the message effectively. The main objective is to be understood and to inspire.
I am having ideas for a blog but I don't know if it will fly.
But I am definitely thinking about it. Maybe it's about time that I took blogging seriously.
Day 39
Past day 39 of my post-resignation season, I think the boredom is getting to me and I am wondering more than ever what will come out of this- me waking up anytime I want, doing household chores, cooking, playing guitar, dancing in front of the xbox console, contemplating of times that have passed, reading books, watching television and eating whatever snacks I can get my hands on. The worst would probably be waiting on all my hardworking family members to come home anytime...I mean I am usually comfortable being alone, as I am a natural introvert, but too much of it can be so boring... like having too much of a steaming mug of hot chocolate (which I am enjoying now).
This thought is keeping me awake at 12:30am now. Oh Lord. Please tell me what to do.
Or maybe it's me being impatient and I should enjoy this. But not doing anything challenging really drives me nuts. I dislike playing the housekeeper role. It's something everyone is expected to do/ can do anyway... so mundane, so common... And I wonder why I have to go through with this...ayyyy obedience, is it?
To be continued...
Sheep 100
What can separate me from you?
What can separate me from your love?
Who can separate me from you?
Who can separate me from your love?
Who can separate me from you?
Who can separate me from your love?
All eyes on Jesus, on Jesus
I was lost and now I'm found
Was in fear, now safe and sound
All my life I had conformed
Now with you I am transformed
Face down and fallen to the ground
Humbled by your majesty
Your love has turned my life around
Your love has set me free
Jesus, Jesus
Jesus, Jesus
Who can say what comes tomorrow
Who can reason about yesterday
I fear nothing because I know
You hold me each and every day
What can separate me from you?
What can separate me from your love?
Who can separate me from you?
Who can separate me from your love?
All hope in Jesus, in Jesus
What can separate me from you?
What can separate me from your love?
Who can separate me from you?
Who can separate me from your love?
All hope in Jesus, in Jesus
On true love
The thing with true love is, you don't always expect it to end up with you standing with someone by your side. Sometimes it means standing alone. Sometimes it means walking away from something or someone you hold dear. Sometimes it means letting go. Sometimes it means getting over something and moving on with life. Sometimes it means holding absolute silence. Sometimes it means being loud. Sometimes it means holding on tightly. Sometimes it means stepping up. Sometimes it means stepping forward. And sometimes, yes, it means standing next to someone you hold dear, but what I mean to remind you of is that, that's not all there is to being really in love. And to know more about love, we'll need to learn from the Author who made Himself into nothing and loved us faithfully with the deepest love the world has ever known.
Wanting His Reason
Recently, I have been more than a little sulky about losing my shot at one of my most precious ambitions. It was a long wait before I realized that dream. It takes me a while to make my decisions, but when I do put my bills on something, I am not one to typically sit around and wait for the stars to fall on me. I am the go-getter who believes that good things come to those who go for it.
But I was then stuck in this very profound disappointment. Why, Lord... I asked... for many weeks I had asked that, even with the idea that I don't deserve anything and I am at his mercy. I simply wanted his reason.
Walkout
I'm sorry for hurting you the way I did
I regret telling you you're all that I need
In fact you're the only one in my heart
And I wish we didn't have to walk away, apart
Should I have held my tongue and strongly denied
Your heart that you offered with all your mind?
No, never! But now as I'm watching you leave
I wish I had said otherwise and refused to receive...
The heart of my love- your heart, your heart...
You know I care for all that you are.
My leaving is not just your loss, but mine.
(But I've scanned the skies for more than a sign.)
In the silence, my heart cries out to you:
I would not leave you if I didn't love you.
Not if I didn't know what is meant to be,
Not if He didn't tell me to set you free.
You say I'm strong so I let you go,
But I say He's strong, so I did let go.
God knows my heart- and you know what's true:
I would not leave you if I didn't love you.
I would not leave you if I didn't love you.
Lessons from Wikichurch
What I learned from reading Wikichurch:
1. There is no such thing as "mature enough" for any Christian. I believe that we are all in working progress until the Lord comes. Like the way Jesus had first sent the twelve, we are being given the holy commission to make disciples of all nations. Note that these men were uneducated commoners who were, by their social standards, not that significant. If I wait for the day til I reach that "maturity" that most people wish for, then I'm never gonna be ready. Why? Because growth can only come by obeying God and doing the holy work He has assigned to us.
2. Discipleship is a relationship, so it requires deep and patient understanding. Everyone has a unique walk with God. Not everyone can see or understand things the way I do. Even if we are all in the same faith, we are not- and will never be- exactly alike. I ought to concern myself with understanding the special needs of the people around me and keeping myself open enough to help them in God's love. Patience and understanding. And mercy. Hehehe.
3. Discipleship must be fun. Some time before, one of my advisers asked me, "Are you having fun (with fellowship)?" I thought it was a minor thing...until I thought about it deeply and realized that I should not miss that significant point. All relationships must have a fun factor. Not all the time, but it MUST be pleasant and nurturing for all those engaged. Especially for Christians, this must not be missed. Oo nga naman. Saan ba ko nakakita ng "cute couple" na hindi masaya at kinikilig?
Sounds too basic? Yeah, but these are striking for me...makes me wonder... hmmm
Sounds too basic? Yeah, but these are striking for me...makes me wonder... hmmm
That's it. :)
Lessons from millennial cults
Recently I read about some facts about millennial cults which sprouted throughout the world. Such knowledge is one of those "nice-to-know" types. I think we can learn from them.
So what is a millennial cult? Well as the term implies, these are cults that claim exact knowledge to the end of all life as we know it and the way to get to "heaven". As a result of their fallacious beliefs, they succumb to bizzare practices and generally lead strange lives while waiting for the date- the end of the world.
And that's what's striking about millennial cults. Even when there have been many wrong predictions (of course), still many people fall for them and fearfully believe in some special dates. History then repeats itself- delusive claims, zealous fanatics, strange rituals, failed prediction, severe disappointment, and then...it's either mass suicide or mass murder. The world has seen this happen over and over again, and it's always tragic. Generally it makes us feel sad, but it also makes us wonder- what is it in millennial cults that people would give their allegiance (and lives) for them?
1. Hope- I've heard somewhere that people lead lives of quiet desperation. Someone even disagreed by saying that we actually live lives of aimless distraction. I believe both are true for most of us. We live in a fallen world where people have a profound sort of loneliness that nothing and no one in this world can blot out or shake off. This dissatisfaction drives us to search for something more. Because the status quo is not "good enough" for any of us, our human hearts long for something beyond this, something otherworldly which might turn out to be the answer to our mysterious longing. No wonder we seek for bits and pieces of happiness in all forms- in new hobbies, new folks, new experiences, new places...and sadly, for some: new philosophies that set deadly trends for them to follow.
2. Escape- This is also related to our natural search for something more. Some people have stopped hoping. They just wish to escape this world. Some people drink, do drugs, or commit suicide. Others join special groups and live away from normal society. For these people, having a "new way" allows for them a graceful and special exit out of this world. It rids them of the same old boring routines that "everyone else" has grown accustomed to. It opens up a new world for them to be free to do things which are considered illegal, but are now permitted for them, thanks to their cohorts. Note that acts within millennial cults have been considered criminal in nature.
Being more aware of this now, what should be the right attitude of every believing Christian? I think we have to be vigilant and be firm in our faith. We should not feel astonished anymore, as if these events are at all surprising. It is true that some will fall away, as Christ had said.(Mt.24:10-11) How do we avoid that? We should hold on to the truth that is God's Word. We should always meditate on the Word and pray for the empowering of the Holy Spirit.(Ro.3:4)
And that is also why we have to joyfully preach the good news of Christ to the world...for truly, our only REAL hope is in the Lord Jesus our Redeemer. In Him every fear of the end is turned to rejoicing, because it will be a new beginning for every believer. As Christians we ought to be passionate about God's will, that the gospel be preached that people may be snatched from the clutches of eternal punishment.
Frankly I wouldn't give so much attention to the minor details of the end of the world, not when I'm excited about the major event- which is finally seeing the Lord face to face.
:)
"But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father." (Mt. 24:36)
"Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." (Mt.28:19-20)
"Everyone will hate you because of me, but those who stand firm to the end will be saved." (Mk.13:13)
So what is a millennial cult? Well as the term implies, these are cults that claim exact knowledge to the end of all life as we know it and the way to get to "heaven". As a result of their fallacious beliefs, they succumb to bizzare practices and generally lead strange lives while waiting for the date- the end of the world.
And that's what's striking about millennial cults. Even when there have been many wrong predictions (of course), still many people fall for them and fearfully believe in some special dates. History then repeats itself- delusive claims, zealous fanatics, strange rituals, failed prediction, severe disappointment, and then...it's either mass suicide or mass murder. The world has seen this happen over and over again, and it's always tragic. Generally it makes us feel sad, but it also makes us wonder- what is it in millennial cults that people would give their allegiance (and lives) for them?
1. Hope- I've heard somewhere that people lead lives of quiet desperation. Someone even disagreed by saying that we actually live lives of aimless distraction. I believe both are true for most of us. We live in a fallen world where people have a profound sort of loneliness that nothing and no one in this world can blot out or shake off. This dissatisfaction drives us to search for something more. Because the status quo is not "good enough" for any of us, our human hearts long for something beyond this, something otherworldly which might turn out to be the answer to our mysterious longing. No wonder we seek for bits and pieces of happiness in all forms- in new hobbies, new folks, new experiences, new places...and sadly, for some: new philosophies that set deadly trends for them to follow.
2. Escape- This is also related to our natural search for something more. Some people have stopped hoping. They just wish to escape this world. Some people drink, do drugs, or commit suicide. Others join special groups and live away from normal society. For these people, having a "new way" allows for them a graceful and special exit out of this world. It rids them of the same old boring routines that "everyone else" has grown accustomed to. It opens up a new world for them to be free to do things which are considered illegal, but are now permitted for them, thanks to their cohorts. Note that acts within millennial cults have been considered criminal in nature.
Being more aware of this now, what should be the right attitude of every believing Christian? I think we have to be vigilant and be firm in our faith. We should not feel astonished anymore, as if these events are at all surprising. It is true that some will fall away, as Christ had said.(Mt.24:10-11) How do we avoid that? We should hold on to the truth that is God's Word. We should always meditate on the Word and pray for the empowering of the Holy Spirit.(Ro.3:4)
And that is also why we have to joyfully preach the good news of Christ to the world...for truly, our only REAL hope is in the Lord Jesus our Redeemer. In Him every fear of the end is turned to rejoicing, because it will be a new beginning for every believer. As Christians we ought to be passionate about God's will, that the gospel be preached that people may be snatched from the clutches of eternal punishment.
Frankly I wouldn't give so much attention to the minor details of the end of the world, not when I'm excited about the major event- which is finally seeing the Lord face to face.
:)
"But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father." (Mt. 24:36)
"Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." (Mt.28:19-20)
"Everyone will hate you because of me, but those who stand firm to the end will be saved." (Mk.13:13)
Significant Change
About two hours before my birthday, I am being reflective. Hmm.
Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me...
What has changed? And does change really matter?
I remember celebrating my birthday last year in a Korean eatery with an uncanny bunch- a mix of my Pinoy and Korean friends. One of them, who was my student, even bothered to buy a small, round buttercream cake tinged with gay pink food coloring. Thankfully he doesn't know that I dislike sweets, so after singing through the birthday rituals, well...I sliced the pastry, but I didn't take a single bite. Secretly. Hehe. Perhaps they failed to notice that past the bottles of white and red sparklers... but that's another thing. Anyway it was really nice. It was filled with well-wishes and the promise of another new beginning.
I guess just like on every New Year's Day, people want to start anew on their birthdays. (Or is this something I'm alone at?) On their birthdays, people want to have something to improve on. They want growth. They expect progress. Even with much verbal denial, I must say that I yearn for that as well. I think about it, too.
So back to my question- What has changed about me? And does it really matter?
For one thing, I feel that I have met a lot more failures than before, lost a lot more hair than before, and read a lot more books than before. Predictable. Taught more students for one more year, made more friends, and learned a lot more grammar points than the last year. Nice. Loved and lost, belonged to a church, and made a lot of fellows. Unbelievable. Learned about sanctification, experienced the power of the Holy Spirit, and knew more than ever, with all my being, that God loves me because of His goodness alone and not mine. Sublime.
Hmm. I believe that a personal time of reflection is necessary on one's birthday- not because the regular contemplation rubs off the novelty of it (come on, there's a need for personal quiet time). I think this is true because it makes us realize- with all the undeserved blessings of a prosperous life, and even THE undeserved life that we have- that we are all, simply, under God's grace. And that realization ought to make us grow more in love with the Lord.
I read somewhere that if I can say that I love the Lord more this year than the last, then in that sense I can say that I am truly progressive in my life- a living progress. I must say that having a deepening relationship with the Lord is probably the only really significant change in my life. Other forms of progress may die with the rest of the world, but not this constant growth that I have with (and because of) my Father. As long as I have Him, then I'll keep on counting my blessings. I'll keep on celebrating my birthdays. I'll continue blowing candles and reflecting tirelesly with each passing year.
So with all the failures, the tears, the mistakes... AND with all the success, the laughter, the accomplishments... Thank you Lord and happy birthday to me!
Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me...
What has changed? And does change really matter?
I remember celebrating my birthday last year in a Korean eatery with an uncanny bunch- a mix of my Pinoy and Korean friends. One of them, who was my student, even bothered to buy a small, round buttercream cake tinged with gay pink food coloring. Thankfully he doesn't know that I dislike sweets, so after singing through the birthday rituals, well...I sliced the pastry, but I didn't take a single bite. Secretly. Hehe. Perhaps they failed to notice that past the bottles of white and red sparklers... but that's another thing. Anyway it was really nice. It was filled with well-wishes and the promise of another new beginning.
I guess just like on every New Year's Day, people want to start anew on their birthdays. (Or is this something I'm alone at?) On their birthdays, people want to have something to improve on. They want growth. They expect progress. Even with much verbal denial, I must say that I yearn for that as well. I think about it, too.
So back to my question- What has changed about me? And does it really matter?
For one thing, I feel that I have met a lot more failures than before, lost a lot more hair than before, and read a lot more books than before. Predictable. Taught more students for one more year, made more friends, and learned a lot more grammar points than the last year. Nice. Loved and lost, belonged to a church, and made a lot of fellows. Unbelievable. Learned about sanctification, experienced the power of the Holy Spirit, and knew more than ever, with all my being, that God loves me because of His goodness alone and not mine. Sublime.
Hmm. I believe that a personal time of reflection is necessary on one's birthday- not because the regular contemplation rubs off the novelty of it (come on, there's a need for personal quiet time). I think this is true because it makes us realize- with all the undeserved blessings of a prosperous life, and even THE undeserved life that we have- that we are all, simply, under God's grace. And that realization ought to make us grow more in love with the Lord.
I read somewhere that if I can say that I love the Lord more this year than the last, then in that sense I can say that I am truly progressive in my life- a living progress. I must say that having a deepening relationship with the Lord is probably the only really significant change in my life. Other forms of progress may die with the rest of the world, but not this constant growth that I have with (and because of) my Father. As long as I have Him, then I'll keep on counting my blessings. I'll keep on celebrating my birthdays. I'll continue blowing candles and reflecting tirelesly with each passing year.
So with all the failures, the tears, the mistakes... AND with all the success, the laughter, the accomplishments... Thank you Lord and happy birthday to me!
Of Stars and Marches
I am beginning to question my personal fascination on knowledge, which kind of borders on obsession sometimes. Sometimes. Some people find it weird...well, most people do find it weird, I think. I mean, how many people do you know are unable to sleep when some impersonal and trivial query pops spontaneously into their minds? Or, do you know someone who actually feels challenged because of some unknown fact that requires an answer?
As far as I know, majority of the world's population would know when to drop the subject (unless we're talking about some issues from the gossip column...which really doesn't tinker my fancy at all).
Anyway, I am doing my kind of monologue again, which is sometimes a habit when I do not watch myself. Hmmm... so with my intellectual fascination...
Like the other day I discovered that the Twinkle Little Star original has seven stanzas and is not at all simple and repetitive. And it was a French piece... oringinally. I wonder why the folks in that era decided that this would be their chosen anthem for putting the little ones to sleep. I guess I would never really know what kind of deliberation had to take place just to have that song recorded and reproduced as one of the most well-known classics of our history.
Hm. Too bad.
Had I been there, I'd have voted for something more direct (with the lyrics going like, "Baby, I can see the stars, and that means you should start sleeping peacefully and let mom and dad sleep soundly as well.") and tone-friendly (for the voice range of the fathers, I mean). And why sing about twinkling stars? Why not the sun, which seems obviously much bigger and more obvious? (Uhm, wait- scratch that- sleeping time's supposed to be at night.) And WHO CREATED THAT SONG ABOUT CRADLE ACCIDENTS?! And mind you, back to the stars- they don't really stop shining- some people merely allow themselves to be deceived by the rotation and revolution of the earth. Limited views.
And on another day, I discovered that the overly played hit soundtrack every March of each passing year (take a guess)... yes, the graduation march booming endlessly in school auditoriums during commencement exercises in the Philippines...(and do you know that only the Philippines has that for a default graduation soundtrack?)...well, it's not really an oringinal Filipino hit. Really, it's not. Maybe the version is, but not ours.
The original piece was composed by some dude from the 19th century (Giuseppe Verdi, 1871). Some great Italian opera composer wanted to create an impressive march music for the second act of his grand opera (Aida), which gained considerable popularity in his era. The music is basically about a bunch of Egyptian soldiers going back home after defeating their Ethiopian assailants- in simple terms, a "Triumphal March", which is also incidentally the title of the piece.
So now... WHY (and I'm really asking)- WHY are we marching to this bloody victory music during graduation? Hmm... Is it because of the liberating aspect of the event with overly stressed students successfully submitting all the tests, projects, thesis defense, cake, ice cream...whatever requirements there may be?
Well, now...if that's what the wise guys thought of, then at some point they may have gotten it right. Hahahaha.
But that makes the students the victorious Egyptians and the teachers the defeated Ethiopians. Oh. Haha. Cool trendsetting. Brilliant. (I wonder how many members of the academic team found out about this interesting fact...)
Little stars and graduation march...I now wonder how many people experienced happiness over discovering these facts that do nothing to change the course of history. *applause* How many people wondered and used the open window (namely the net) to find out about these things?
Hmm... I'll never know and I'll just shrug it off. Not sensible. Yeah, that's true. My personal and voluntary pursuit of knowledge has no tangible, earth-shattering effect on the rest of the universe. But it does feel good for me- dose of serotonin. But back to my initial q before I forget and publish this without thinking- Why are some people so keen on finding out about things?
I guess I have to accept the fact that I am just wired that way. I believe that is the best explanation I know so far. Should I thank God for this analytical (sometimes over) wiring I got from Him? Oh yes, absolutely. Though sometimes it gets me antsy, well... there are diversions. And I ought to learn self-control.
Got to sleep. But before that, I really wonder- and I am not putting this case to rest- WHO CREATED THAT PSYCHO SONG ABOUT FALLING CRADLES?! I think now's the time to use that tagline- "Think about the children!" (or the babies, if you may- if we're being strict on terminology, ha...)
Hm. Too bad.
Had I been there, I'd have voted for something more direct (with the lyrics going like, "Baby, I can see the stars, and that means you should start sleeping peacefully and let mom and dad sleep soundly as well.") and tone-friendly (for the voice range of the fathers, I mean). And why sing about twinkling stars? Why not the sun, which seems obviously much bigger and more obvious? (Uhm, wait- scratch that- sleeping time's supposed to be at night.) And WHO CREATED THAT SONG ABOUT CRADLE ACCIDENTS?! And mind you, back to the stars- they don't really stop shining- some people merely allow themselves to be deceived by the rotation and revolution of the earth. Limited views.
And on another day, I discovered that the overly played hit soundtrack every March of each passing year (take a guess)... yes, the graduation march booming endlessly in school auditoriums during commencement exercises in the Philippines...(and do you know that only the Philippines has that for a default graduation soundtrack?)...well, it's not really an oringinal Filipino hit. Really, it's not. Maybe the version is, but not ours.
The original piece was composed by some dude from the 19th century (Giuseppe Verdi, 1871). Some great Italian opera composer wanted to create an impressive march music for the second act of his grand opera (Aida), which gained considerable popularity in his era. The music is basically about a bunch of Egyptian soldiers going back home after defeating their Ethiopian assailants- in simple terms, a "Triumphal March", which is also incidentally the title of the piece.
So now... WHY (and I'm really asking)- WHY are we marching to this bloody victory music during graduation? Hmm... Is it because of the liberating aspect of the event with overly stressed students successfully submitting all the tests, projects, thesis defense, cake, ice cream...whatever requirements there may be?
Well, now...if that's what the wise guys thought of, then at some point they may have gotten it right. Hahahaha.
But that makes the students the victorious Egyptians and the teachers the defeated Ethiopians. Oh. Haha. Cool trendsetting. Brilliant. (I wonder how many members of the academic team found out about this interesting fact...)
Little stars and graduation march...I now wonder how many people experienced happiness over discovering these facts that do nothing to change the course of history. *applause* How many people wondered and used the open window (namely the net) to find out about these things?
Hmm... I'll never know and I'll just shrug it off. Not sensible. Yeah, that's true. My personal and voluntary pursuit of knowledge has no tangible, earth-shattering effect on the rest of the universe. But it does feel good for me- dose of serotonin. But back to my initial q before I forget and publish this without thinking- Why are some people so keen on finding out about things?
I guess I have to accept the fact that I am just wired that way. I believe that is the best explanation I know so far. Should I thank God for this analytical (sometimes over) wiring I got from Him? Oh yes, absolutely. Though sometimes it gets me antsy, well... there are diversions. And I ought to learn self-control.
Got to sleep. But before that, I really wonder- and I am not putting this case to rest- WHO CREATED THAT PSYCHO SONG ABOUT FALLING CRADLES?! I think now's the time to use that tagline- "Think about the children!" (or the babies, if you may- if we're being strict on terminology, ha...)
Shot down again
hmmm... silenced again!
really won't elaborate. i realize that lewis was really right to say that man is too easily pleased. the chasing after the wind is getting tiring. grrr.
but it is a painfully good reminder not to put our hopes on anything except the Lord.
Always Yours
Why can't it be?
Why can't it be the two of us?
Why can't we be...
For now I sit and ask and wonder... I wish I understood why... Oh Lord... why lead me to this path... I hate not understanding situations. I hate making hurtful decisions... Can I really trust you to shatter this pain?
That's a rhetorical questions... However I think, however I ask, struggle, go over every detail of certain matters, I believe I will always go back to You and Your perfect will that shall stand undefeated. I will always go back to You, my Lord who has never disappointed me. Not that it's Your priority... after all, Your glory is always first and You deserve it all.You deserve my whole life, my mind, my decisions...all for You. I came from you, and I have always been meant to be Yours.
Yes, I will always return to the Truth. You are all I truly have, Lord... I can only live by You.
Why can't it be the two of us?
Why can't we be...
For now I sit and ask and wonder... I wish I understood why... Oh Lord... why lead me to this path... I hate not understanding situations. I hate making hurtful decisions... Can I really trust you to shatter this pain?
That's a rhetorical questions... However I think, however I ask, struggle, go over every detail of certain matters, I believe I will always go back to You and Your perfect will that shall stand undefeated. I will always go back to You, my Lord who has never disappointed me. Not that it's Your priority... after all, Your glory is always first and You deserve it all.You deserve my whole life, my mind, my decisions...all for You. I came from you, and I have always been meant to be Yours.
Yes, I will always return to the Truth. You are all I truly have, Lord... I can only live by You.
White Flag
Composed on Jan.6... I realize that God can work mightily in those who choose to surrender... that is why the place of power is in the place of prayer... in prayer, we surrender...in prayer, we lay down our arms for God to work in us.
At the break of dawn,
At the rising on the sun,
On Your holy ground,
I lay myself down.
Tired of running,
Tired of fighting,
Tired of always saying no,
Tired of crying,
Tired of hating,
Tired of knowing I don't know
There is no use
Trying not to lose
When this battle is God's
And you got to lose it all to God
Got to hand it all to You
Yeah I got to give it all to You
Lord here's my best
I'm saying yes
I surrender to You
I surrender to You
Yielding now
Kneeling down
Here's my will under Yours
Here's my heart under Yours
I surrender
I surrender
I surrender to You
I surrender to You
Yielding now
Kneeling down
Here's my will under Yours
Here's my heart under Yours
I surrender
I surrender
Nothing Else Matters
(Inspired by a Psalms verse...
Truly, He is the only one we can truly believe in!)
My worries turn like leaves,
Carried by the wind of your grace.
My wounds fade out to nothing
With the healing of your embrace.
For great is Your love,
Higher than the heavens.
Your faithfulness reaches to the skies.
Stir me with Your unfailing love.
Be exalted forever, mighty God!
My eyes are set on You as the world fades away,
And nothing else matters.
My fears crumble like ashes,
Carried by the wind of Your grace.
My pain is changed to joy
With the healing of Your embrace.
For great is Your love,
Higher than the heavens.
Your faithfulness reaches to the skies.
Set me free with Your saving love.
I thank You forever, mighty God!
My heart is set on You as the world fades away,
And nothing else matters.
And nothing else matters but You, and You, my Lord...
Truly, He is the only one we can truly believe in!)
My worries turn like leaves,
Carried by the wind of your grace.
My wounds fade out to nothing
With the healing of your embrace.
For great is Your love,
Higher than the heavens.
Your faithfulness reaches to the skies.
Stir me with Your unfailing love.
Be exalted forever, mighty God!
My eyes are set on You as the world fades away,
And nothing else matters.
My fears crumble like ashes,
Carried by the wind of Your grace.
My pain is changed to joy
With the healing of Your embrace.
For great is Your love,
Higher than the heavens.
Your faithfulness reaches to the skies.
Set me free with Your saving love.
I thank You forever, mighty God!
My heart is set on You as the world fades away,
And nothing else matters.
And nothing else matters but You, and You, my Lord...
NO (When God says no)
(Composed as I typed. Crazy... but...)
I guessed I wanted to love you and make you mine. But then now, I realize...it's not my choice because it's not God's will. Hm.
Don't you dare go that way again,
It's gonna be the same pain if you begin.
Do you not remember the times of old,
You were left disappointed and so cold?
Over time you were able to get back on your feet,
Understand- that's enough, and this is it!
Remember that I snatched you with a price to pay,
Even if it cost me dearly just to make THE way.
All I did for you because I'm true!
Love is here, and you know- I love you!
Look at me now and forget about him.
You'll receive the best- more than your dream!
Love is more than just your being happy.
Everything you need, you'll find in me,
All the love and freedom you've yet conceived.
Reach out and dare to risk, believe!
Nothing is impossible, you just wait and see!
I guessed I wanted to love you and make you mine. But then now, I realize...it's not my choice because it's not God's will. Hm.
Don't you dare go that way again,
It's gonna be the same pain if you begin.
Do you not remember the times of old,
You were left disappointed and so cold?
Over time you were able to get back on your feet,
Understand- that's enough, and this is it!
Remember that I snatched you with a price to pay,
Even if it cost me dearly just to make THE way.
All I did for you because I'm true!
Love is here, and you know- I love you!
Look at me now and forget about him.
You'll receive the best- more than your dream!
Love is more than just your being happy.
Everything you need, you'll find in me,
All the love and freedom you've yet conceived.
Reach out and dare to risk, believe!
Nothing is impossible, you just wait and see!
Two Poems
Been a poet since I was twelve... got the hype after the English teacher told us to write a haiku as part of written exercise.
Enjoy...
1.Musings~
You are not mine, I am not yours.
I am perhaps yearning for something close to the real thing.
What is it? Some call it love.
And sometimes I'm thinking it's you...
That true love has been standing in front of me for a while.
Am I in love? I've asked myself.
Do you love me? How do you feel?
Yet I cannot bear to ask you for real.
For when I think of it more, I realize that I cannot pay the price.
I cannot commit to someone who doesn't seem to understand the gravity of long-term relationships.
So come, let's leave it in a drawer and forget it.
Hide the proposal under lock and key.
Yes, we are single.
Yes, we are free.
No, I won't ever love you.
2.The Winning Song
It's a glorious day of celebration
A festivity of friendships and fiery passion
My eyes saw the smiles, my ears heard the laughter
Though a song in my mind sounded so much beter
How time slow-danced as I met your gaze
Embracing my senses through the crowded haze
While everyone else melted away in applause
I saw only you in that moment's pause
Nothing mattered as you held me firmly
Nothing else but your smile, and you and me
Even my heart can never go wrong
Resounding your secret winning song
Don't mind the world as we sway to the sound
Don't mind the commotion of everyone around
All I know is I hear the song
As it tells me clearly we both belong
To the fortunate few who can really hear
To such blessed hearts wthout much fear
Go on and take your hero's stand
Go ahead and feel it, take her hand
All you know is you hear the song
And it tells you clearly you both belong
Not Why But When
Someday, you will realize why this is happening- including all the disgusting hair growth, unusual complexion, and uneven distribution of body mass. Oh, and the persecution, rejection, and ostracism. Though your sorrow may last for a night, you'll see...joy comes in the morning. You know in your heart that I am with you always and I love you.
~ God, to the contemplative caterpillar
~ God, to the contemplative caterpillar
Why 10,000 Reasons captured my interest
Recently I was able to listen to one of the songs at the Christian billboard, entitled, "10,000 Reasons" by Matt Redman. From the start of the song I was spellbound. I literally had to put down my book to pay more attention to it. It really stopped the time for me. That means it's a good song...
So what makes it special? The rhythm is not so new- just guitar strumming mostly... I think it's a great song because of the inspiring combination of thoughts in the lyrics. This praise and worship song expresses two very important ideas:
1. the basic life goal of every Christian: to glorify the Lord each day of this life and beyond
2. two important attributes of God- kindness and patience for His people
Aw. Brimming with delight. I desire to worship and just bask in the love of God..!
Bless the Lord, o my soul... o my soul...worship Your Holy Name!
So what makes it special? The rhythm is not so new- just guitar strumming mostly... I think it's a great song because of the inspiring combination of thoughts in the lyrics. This praise and worship song expresses two very important ideas:
1. the basic life goal of every Christian: to glorify the Lord each day of this life and beyond
2. two important attributes of God- kindness and patience for His people
Aw. Brimming with delight. I desire to worship and just bask in the love of God..!
Bless the Lord, o my soul... o my soul...worship Your Holy Name!
Masanay Ka Na
Hay Diyos ko, sabi ko nga po eh...
Sa gabing ito, pagkalipas ng aking pagmumuni at ating pag-uusap, naipaalala Niyo po sa akin ang isang *sabay tingin sa google ng katumbas na salita* bersikulo sa aklat ni Pedro-
(eto hindi ko na maitatagalog at nako... hahaha)
1 Peter 12-13- "Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed."
Dapat hindi na po ako nagugulat sa nangyayari sa akin... lalo na nitong mga huling linggo na sinusubok ang katatagan ng aking pananampalataya. Ang hirap lalo na kung ang mga mahal mo ang mismong nagbibigay ng hirap sa iyo. Alam ko naman na pangako ng Diyos ang pagsalba sa 'kanila'... siyempre sa takdang oras at plano Niyo po, darating iyan... Hay, ewan ko ba.
...
Nako, mare...masanay ka na. Ayos lang, masaya ka naman. Totoong masaya...malaya...panatag ang loob dahil sa Kanya.
Sa ngayon, nararapat lang na maging matatag... ganyan talaga ang resulta ng isang matinding pagpapasiya: Malamang may mga dapat isantabi...mga bagay na hindi na mahalaga kung ang pagtutuunan ng pansin ay ang bagay na napiling panindigan. :)
Diyos ko... lagi Niyo po akong paalalahanan... Salamat po sa karunungan na ibinibigay Niyo. Turuan Niyo po akong maging matatag...
9 Books (and why you ought to pick them up asap)
I've been a bookworm for as long as I can remember (yes, I literally started the addiction from picture books). Must be the smell of the pages... but more than that, I think that books are, as my friend once told me in my college days, "intellectual investments." Every book has some considerable value which goes beyond its price tag. Never mind the popular reads... but for me, there are only three types of books:
Class A- You must read this before you die! (Revolutionary.)
Class B- You should read this. (Highly recommended.)
Class C- You may read this. (Or not.)
I believe that books are indispensable, and there are some particularly memorable ones which have heavily influenced my way of thinking, mostly in my walk with the Lord. This is why I have made a list of the books which I hope that all people should read as soon as possible. So far, there are 27 titles in my list, but here, I will only be talking about nine... lest you'd want to spend a very long dinner with me to discuss each.
So! Not in order... here are my Top 9 (Class A) book selections, all published by OMF-
1. The Jesus I Never Knew by Philip Yancey-
Yancey's inquisitive nature has captured the sentiment of the world, including mine, I believe. His writings come off so genuine because he asks the raw questions that not too many believers would want to delve in. I think I was able to know more of the Lord's omnipotence AND humility by reading this book, which is a product of Yancey's personal search for God. It offers a closer (and I mean really CLOSER) look on the persona of Jesus- his godly and human attributes. If you're serious about knowing Jesus and you have (or you want to have) a personal relationship with him, then this is a very important book to read. Very heavy, but profoundly satisfying.
2. Eros Redeemed by John White-
Agape is the popular type, but in the popular culture, Eros is the mainstay. In a time when sexual liberation is becoming an accepted norm, White opens the discussion of Eros through this brilliant exposition. In this book, he boldly discusses sexual love as God's wonderful creation, and also dispels common and wrong beliefs about it. In detail, he talks about the gravity of sexual sin, and why it is indeed one of the worst sins to deal with. In a sex-crazed society, this is a much-needed read for a better perspective. I don't care if it's an old book- the issues presented within are still very much apparent in the modern day. I believe that my view of sex has improved through reading this book.
3. The Bondage Breaker by Neil Anderson-
I've read this for about 14 times, and I still think it rightly belongs to the shelves of the classics. Anderson comes up with a detailed list (yes, there is a list) of worldly elements which can be sources of bondages for people, Christian or non-Christian. Many books discuss about sin, but few contain straightforward points like the ones in this book. From this I learned that sin does not stop at just the act of sinning- there is more to it than just the "wrong" action, both in the natural and supernatural realms. Reading this more than once has deepened my understanding of strongholds, and, more importantly, of my freedom in Christ. If you want to know more about that, then this is the book to read.
4. What's So Amazing About Grace? by Philip Yancey-
Another self-searching book of Yancey, this attempts to explain the grace of God in a more detailed fashion. Yancey uses accounts of different people to show the transcendent power of grace and why everyone- and I mean every one of us- needs it. Having had my share of doubts regarding grace, I would gladly give this book to someone who wants to be assured of the mystery of God's finished work of salvation through Jesus. Mind-blowing (come on, it's a Yancey pick), but very sincere. I can feel the heart of "a man after God's own heart" beating through the pages.
5. I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris-
For the young ones and the young once, this proves to be a challenging read. Harris, having written this from his dating and non-dating experience, offers practical Bible-based views and solutions to honor God through a life of holiness. I had first read this when I was in high school, and I think it has substatially helped in shaping my attitude on relationships (including waiting on the Lord for my husband). I personally think that this is so controversial in the sense that the typical dater would not even think of the idea of "not dating" to meet God's destined partner. Even then, I fiercely agree with this guy. This book is full of wisdom concerning different aspects of romantic relationships and allowing God to take hold of them.
6. Love Must Be Tough by James Dobson-
I am not married, but my personal interest in the intricate workings of a godly marriage has often led me to read books about the subject. I must say that this book is the best one I've come across so far. Reading this has given me real hope that marriages can be beautiful (my parents got separated). Dobson, having been happily married for more than 50 years, draws from personal experience as he gives practical solutions for various types of conflicts in marriage. It is interesting to note that this book actually came under fire, since during the time it was published, the commonly accepted idea is that marital conflicts should be dealt with passively and silently (meaning the offended Christian partner ought to suffer quietly and just pray). Dobson disagrees with this traditional method and presents proactive and effective ways to handle such difficult matters. This is perfect for couples NOT under fire- although it can be a useful read for those who actually ARE- but this is something I'd recommend more for couples in the early stage of their relationships. Why? Early prevention is better than cure.
7. Do Hard Things by Alex and Brett Harris-
Honestly I had initially picked this up because of their association with Joshua Harris (their older brother). I had expected a Class B, self-help novel for teenagers, but it was not long before I was very much moved by the Rebelution, a movement (started by the twin brothers themselves) which dares teenagers to do more than what the contemporary society expects them to do. This is what the book is mostly about- that people should start doing hard things in their time of youth, not when they become adults. The book discusses key people who have stepped up early in their lives and successfully built their own legacies for the benefit of the world. I wish I had read this ten years ago. I had actually given my copy away to my younger cousin, as I thought that she would be empowered by such an optimistic perspective of the youth. A powerful and motivational read. Not for traditionalists.
8. The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman-
Who wouldn't know Chapman? He has popularized the love languages concept for all of us. His study has immensely benefitted a lot of people in their dealings with love and relationships. In this book, he explains the various expressions of love and how to harness its powers for the enhancement of relationships. Suddenly, the cliche that everyone needs love has become clearer through this. I will always be thankful that I have read this book, since it has given me a very useful and real insight on what it means to give and receive love. Everyone who wants to understand love and how to improve relationships must read this book! Practical and handy in all interpersonal dealings.
9. Joyfully Single by Harold J. Sala-
The bookstore shelves have always been full of titles on marriage, and I think during the time when this book was published, books on the season of singlehood are a rarity. In this intriguing novel, Sala gives a refreshingly positive view of the nurturing life of a single and shouts once and for all that singlehood is not a curse- but a gift and a season to enjoy. This has given me a lot of encouragement, especially since I'm waiting on my husband in an unconventional way (that is, prayerfully waiting on the Lord, thanks to Harris' view). In the Philippine scene where being a single adult is an indication of being cursed with some serious characteristic defect, I think this is highly essential for us to keep trusting God as we continue to flourish- even as a single.
There you have it! And if I were to add two more titles, I'd say the Bible and Narnia. Bible is the Word. Narnia is a classic.
I hope to read more books! Nothing like a great read to chew on...
What about you? What's on your list?^^
Class A- You must read this before you die! (Revolutionary.)
Class B- You should read this. (Highly recommended.)
Class C- You may read this. (Or not.)
I believe that books are indispensable, and there are some particularly memorable ones which have heavily influenced my way of thinking, mostly in my walk with the Lord. This is why I have made a list of the books which I hope that all people should read as soon as possible. So far, there are 27 titles in my list, but here, I will only be talking about nine... lest you'd want to spend a very long dinner with me to discuss each.
So! Not in order... here are my Top 9 (Class A) book selections, all published by OMF-
1. The Jesus I Never Knew by Philip Yancey-
Yancey's inquisitive nature has captured the sentiment of the world, including mine, I believe. His writings come off so genuine because he asks the raw questions that not too many believers would want to delve in. I think I was able to know more of the Lord's omnipotence AND humility by reading this book, which is a product of Yancey's personal search for God. It offers a closer (and I mean really CLOSER) look on the persona of Jesus- his godly and human attributes. If you're serious about knowing Jesus and you have (or you want to have) a personal relationship with him, then this is a very important book to read. Very heavy, but profoundly satisfying.
2. Eros Redeemed by John White-
Agape is the popular type, but in the popular culture, Eros is the mainstay. In a time when sexual liberation is becoming an accepted norm, White opens the discussion of Eros through this brilliant exposition. In this book, he boldly discusses sexual love as God's wonderful creation, and also dispels common and wrong beliefs about it. In detail, he talks about the gravity of sexual sin, and why it is indeed one of the worst sins to deal with. In a sex-crazed society, this is a much-needed read for a better perspective. I don't care if it's an old book- the issues presented within are still very much apparent in the modern day. I believe that my view of sex has improved through reading this book.
3. The Bondage Breaker by Neil Anderson-
I've read this for about 14 times, and I still think it rightly belongs to the shelves of the classics. Anderson comes up with a detailed list (yes, there is a list) of worldly elements which can be sources of bondages for people, Christian or non-Christian. Many books discuss about sin, but few contain straightforward points like the ones in this book. From this I learned that sin does not stop at just the act of sinning- there is more to it than just the "wrong" action, both in the natural and supernatural realms. Reading this more than once has deepened my understanding of strongholds, and, more importantly, of my freedom in Christ. If you want to know more about that, then this is the book to read.
4. What's So Amazing About Grace? by Philip Yancey-
Another self-searching book of Yancey, this attempts to explain the grace of God in a more detailed fashion. Yancey uses accounts of different people to show the transcendent power of grace and why everyone- and I mean every one of us- needs it. Having had my share of doubts regarding grace, I would gladly give this book to someone who wants to be assured of the mystery of God's finished work of salvation through Jesus. Mind-blowing (come on, it's a Yancey pick), but very sincere. I can feel the heart of "a man after God's own heart" beating through the pages.
5. I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris-
For the young ones and the young once, this proves to be a challenging read. Harris, having written this from his dating and non-dating experience, offers practical Bible-based views and solutions to honor God through a life of holiness. I had first read this when I was in high school, and I think it has substatially helped in shaping my attitude on relationships (including waiting on the Lord for my husband). I personally think that this is so controversial in the sense that the typical dater would not even think of the idea of "not dating" to meet God's destined partner. Even then, I fiercely agree with this guy. This book is full of wisdom concerning different aspects of romantic relationships and allowing God to take hold of them.
6. Love Must Be Tough by James Dobson-
I am not married, but my personal interest in the intricate workings of a godly marriage has often led me to read books about the subject. I must say that this book is the best one I've come across so far. Reading this has given me real hope that marriages can be beautiful (my parents got separated). Dobson, having been happily married for more than 50 years, draws from personal experience as he gives practical solutions for various types of conflicts in marriage. It is interesting to note that this book actually came under fire, since during the time it was published, the commonly accepted idea is that marital conflicts should be dealt with passively and silently (meaning the offended Christian partner ought to suffer quietly and just pray). Dobson disagrees with this traditional method and presents proactive and effective ways to handle such difficult matters. This is perfect for couples NOT under fire- although it can be a useful read for those who actually ARE- but this is something I'd recommend more for couples in the early stage of their relationships. Why? Early prevention is better than cure.
7. Do Hard Things by Alex and Brett Harris-
Honestly I had initially picked this up because of their association with Joshua Harris (their older brother). I had expected a Class B, self-help novel for teenagers, but it was not long before I was very much moved by the Rebelution, a movement (started by the twin brothers themselves) which dares teenagers to do more than what the contemporary society expects them to do. This is what the book is mostly about- that people should start doing hard things in their time of youth, not when they become adults. The book discusses key people who have stepped up early in their lives and successfully built their own legacies for the benefit of the world. I wish I had read this ten years ago. I had actually given my copy away to my younger cousin, as I thought that she would be empowered by such an optimistic perspective of the youth. A powerful and motivational read. Not for traditionalists.
8. The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman-
Who wouldn't know Chapman? He has popularized the love languages concept for all of us. His study has immensely benefitted a lot of people in their dealings with love and relationships. In this book, he explains the various expressions of love and how to harness its powers for the enhancement of relationships. Suddenly, the cliche that everyone needs love has become clearer through this. I will always be thankful that I have read this book, since it has given me a very useful and real insight on what it means to give and receive love. Everyone who wants to understand love and how to improve relationships must read this book! Practical and handy in all interpersonal dealings.
9. Joyfully Single by Harold J. Sala-
The bookstore shelves have always been full of titles on marriage, and I think during the time when this book was published, books on the season of singlehood are a rarity. In this intriguing novel, Sala gives a refreshingly positive view of the nurturing life of a single and shouts once and for all that singlehood is not a curse- but a gift and a season to enjoy. This has given me a lot of encouragement, especially since I'm waiting on my husband in an unconventional way (that is, prayerfully waiting on the Lord, thanks to Harris' view). In the Philippine scene where being a single adult is an indication of being cursed with some serious characteristic defect, I think this is highly essential for us to keep trusting God as we continue to flourish- even as a single.
There you have it! And if I were to add two more titles, I'd say the Bible and Narnia. Bible is the Word. Narnia is a classic.
I hope to read more books! Nothing like a great read to chew on...
What about you? What's on your list?^^
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