7 Quote Awards

Booster award (morning smiles):

Every sacrifice has a fruitful reward,
Every failure has a second chance,
We only have to be strong by God’s grace to persevere in the tests of life!
-Pamela (folk dance friend, second sem)

Astigin award (I sure love this one):

Bakit pag kaibigan walang petsa kung kalian naging kayo?
Walang anniversaries na sinecelebrate?
Walang commitment with each other?
Pero isa lang ang maganda doon,
Na kahit mag-away kayo, walang break-up, di ba?
-Shuri (since sj, grade 5- where are you)

Epal award (and hilarious na rin, cge):

“Kumusta ang nilalang na sumalo ng lahat ng suwerte at kagandahan na isinaboy ng Maykapal? Ang taong busilak ang puso?”
“Ah, ok naman ako.”
-Lorenz (epal shoti since first sem)

Sentimiyento award (sort of):

I thank God for stitiching friends into the fabric of my life,
Their colorful patterns and personalities add richness to who I am.
Thanks, my precious thread.
-One Eyed (that’s how we call my aunt)

Mais award (pati yung sender, umamin ka):

I have a little angel flying around with a hammer,
Each person he hits gets a little of my love and friendship,
Sana ikaw, bugbugin ka niya!
-Mark (kambal since second sem- pano yan, buhay pa ko? Wahahaha)

Comfort award (and panama sa akin):

I know you have worries and fears,
I know how you keep it all inside and how you fight back the tears,
But you must remember, life isn’t for you alone to bear,
I’m here, and you know I care.
-Jonreph (tormenting since sj, first year)

Sniff award (who would have thought):

When things are down and your hope is gone,
Remember I'm here to cheer you right on,
Because through the bad times when winning is hard to do,
I'll stop my own world just to help you pull through.
-Mark (corny ever)

Last Saturday I transfered all my things back to my room in malabon. I made my general cleaning, threw away even my little senti stuffs and came up with my little haven back here. :)

I played my guitar and slept for twelve hours after that.

It was good for the suffering soul. I was lonesome and missing so much of my usually hectic life. I miss my friends. I miss my ex-neighbors Tiff and Therese. I miss quickee. I even miss the ice cream store with the nasty old Chinese gurang...sniff...

Oh, well...at least magkaka-DSL na rin kami. And we got phone na uli, hehehe...can't live long without techno assistance...

My to-do list:

- Deal with my relationship with God (I have issues with the big boss)
- Update with my old friends (among them are my bros, Aunt ko, Shuri, Hershey, Ian...)
- Go out with my friends and have a blast for at least once
- find a summer job
- watch the full second season of Desperate Housewives
- improve guitar skills
- shop with Bern
- share my transformation (akin na lang ito)
- try piano
- tennis bonding with mammita
- paint my room
- learn how to take BP
- go for a swim on my birthday
- kill a cockroach (I hate them , but my Aunt said I should face my fears)

yan, pdi na cguro yan...la n tlg ako mgwang mtino, hahaha...cge...take care, my peepz

Ang Pag-ibig nga naman...

Today I am very very happy. And I don't think I can feel any less of it today. I met up with Paulo to talk. And I am glad that as we parted ways, we have settled it all.

Love. It is such a big word, yet only a few dare talk of it. Unseen, but everywhere...you just have to open your eyes, and more importantly- your heart- to be able to see it. Love is not pride. Love is unselfish. Love is not infatuation. Love is not demanding what is best for you, but leans closer to fulfill the others' interests and needs. Love does not cause insecurities, but is like the sun to a seedling, under where it grows steady. Love is not something you just do-

Yah, so much about smart sayings of love. Ano naman kaya at nagsusulat na naman ako tungkol dito? Hmm...I have been so silent about this subject for so long, but I feel that it is about time I talked of what I perceive of LOVE.

Love in God's principles is unconditional. That is the sum of it. And did you know that God can choose for you through sending you a sign kung sino ang dapat na makatuluyan mo? :)

Oo, totoo yan, and I am not talking about gut feelings and compatability...kasi pag love, God will only give you someone na makakafill ng needs mo at shortcomings mo- during the time when you have really achieved maturity. And also, I am not talking of GFs/BFs here (wla ngang ganun sa Bible eh, hahaha).

Example: Kung ikaw ay impatient, God will give you a partner who is patient. If you've got two brains (one is lost, and the other one is looking for it- aka wa yutak, wahahaha), God will give you a smart and sensible partner to teach you that. :) And God always ensures a very firm and stable base for a perfect relationship...only possible through true friendship.

My Psych teacher once told me that those who succeed in relationships are those who persist in deep friendship. Sadly, that's the least-occuring relationship in our society today...

Yah, most people might not agree with that, that it is through trial and error that you know kung sino ang nararapat, or THE ONE...kaya nga may 'ligaw'. May 'dating'.

But isn't that taking matters into your own hands? Eh di ba sabi sa Proverbs: "Trust the Lord with all your heart and all your soul: in all ways acknowedge him and he will make your paths straight."

But sadly, the norm is the other way, the ligaw and date and all that ritual. Girl likes boy, boy likes girl, a little pursuing, compromising, and that's it! End of story.

But isn't it a wonder why we have lots of separations and divorces going on these days? Breakups, at the very least...which causes us to feel the loss and struggle- time, emotions, efforts, energy, money...and more importantly, broken relationships which can never be mended as well as before. And they say the norm is the best way...when the stories that we hear nowadays is mostly the same, about broken families and poor children suffering the most...

Come on, that is the biggest mistake of this society...it doesn't mean that everyone is at it means that it is the right thing. Smokers are socially acceptable, but it's not physically beneficial. Two-timer guys are hailed as macho, but they're sinning and hurting, right? Would you curse every three minutes just because it's cool for most people? No. Would you do PMS just because everyone in the university is doing it? No! In dealing withstuff like this, we should use our head- and the principles of God!

"People who ride the waves are those who just follow trend and can't think for themselves."

All I'm saying is that, in the ways of searching for the right partner, it is not acceptable to just go with your gut feelings and "follow your heart". God will give the right one if you seek and ask for it. Of course it can only happen if God thinks you're in the right age and that you have matured enough. Kaya ka nga binigyan ng utak eh, to rule over your heart and govern your emotions in making the right decisions.

I am not against ligaw and dating...some may even succeed there. But isn't it better to depend on God's recommendation for every one of us? :) Besides, trusting in him to choose for us saves us the time and energy. We also need not wrestle with doubts and bad experiences, because we know that he won't give us someone less than the best. That is, if we trust him whole (we should!!!).

So kids- guard your heart and don't let it loose- don't be too serious at this age if you want to avoid troublesome relationships. Mere crushies and attractions are fine, as long as they are consciously taken as pure admirations. But just hold your water until the right time comes.

*(feel free to comment! and if you want more of where i am getting this, read Josha Harris' I Kissed Dating Goodbye.-Php 195.00. And read your Bible!(Chronicles))

Imprisoned thoughts

Because of what I have recently been up to, I am now a pronounced prisoner of this four walls of my current residence by the creek side.

In other words, I am banned for the meantime! Hahahaha!

Seriously I didn't count on my mama to catch up so easily, but she did, and because my brother Keith testified against me (**@$$$&%!!! traitor!!!), that means I get a timeout here. Ma said I am never going out. Ever. Well, she's always given me empty threats...I hope this is one of them.

Her reason: I lie my way out when I can just tell her truth and she would say YES.

My reason for lying: She never agrees. She exaggerates danger when it's always there, apparently. And I would never learn if I can't go city-hopping on an adventure of my own. Besides, the house is boring. New sights are fun.

The Christian way is: Parents are figures of authority in the family. And as long as you are their children you are obliged to follow, unless they order you to do mortal sin. Lying is never justified. Remember that Satan is the Father of all lies. And anything that does not come from God comes from the devil.

My humor is sooo empty as well. It is not funny. Mammita has not been talking to me since I came back home from Tif's, and frankly I am never happy about it.

But then regrets flood my mind as an extra...

Had I known yesterday that things would come this far, I would have given all my remaining stolen moments to Bern and stay with her in her home. Or maybe stayed longer in Tif and Therese's place and watched PBB, see Keanna win and celebrate that moment with them. I would have not refused to eat more of that oversweetened Starbucks chocolate cake. I would have finished Bequa's project better. And had I known that I would not be seeing my Pau for a while, I would have literally pleaded and asked him to stay with me at least until I got on to a jeep yesterday on my way back. I would have told him that I was very sad and disappointed that he couldn't risk his neck for me. And though he'd refuse, I would have swallowed my loneliness and kissed him farewell.

But then, reality check: I didn't.

Which brings me to the subject of regretting when you could have done things differently. Or done things you would have, at least.

I don't think one could ever get through life and actually understand contentment without first going through that kind of feeling. I believe every one of us comes to a point in life when they wish they can change some things they have said and done in the past.

I am thinking it must be part of human nature to want that so much, impossible it may seem. We can repair and mend some things left behind. But to change whole events to match favorable consequences is merely idealistic, and never possible. Which is why we have pain. We have suffering. We go through life with unresolved issues.

But I also believe that there is a God who can save us all from that. A God who can change it all for the better and make us grow from all sorts of mistakes in the past. Here comes the power of prayer. All sorts of beautiful possiblilities can come through this holy connection we have with the Lord. And we undeniably need him whenever something troubles us, something we even speak of as a complaint. And how often is that?

My dear friends, that's everyday.

Now, if only all of us could realize that...

mad about Harry

Don't go denying it, am sure most of you there are fans too...like me.

Recently I finally managed to borrow a copy of JK Rowling's 5th book on Harry Potter. (Thanks to Bern)

It was breathtaking...man, I missed the hero...yas, I AM mad about Harry.

Well of course I am so against the wizardry concept, but in fiction, he's great. I feel like I can relate to his experiences a lot. And he's great.

Menacing Snape's one of my faves here. I'm hating Ron, loving Minerva, hating Sirius, loving Hermione, hating Cho (duh), loving Ginny, hating Mrs. Weasley, loving Lupin, hating Fudge (dapat lang), loving Aunt Petunia, hahahaha...and the worst of them all who really ticked me off was that Umbridge character. She kept me reading, hahaha...that was odd...

But really, really now...I don't think I am EVER getting over that page when Harry kissed Cho! Man, that's...it's like GMA suddenly decided that she was too old for presidency (which I doubt she would ever admit, come on...). I was freaking out by myself when I came to that page (my bros might be thinkin' their sister's jinxed or just mental, hahaha). I can't get over it now- it's not how I had hoped it would be...

Child abouse ito! xp wahahaha...the poor lad's got no clue about handling issues with girls...in short, too young to date just anyone...yet? Maybe...

Basta...accuse me of being conservative, antisocial jerk, feminist (wha?)...or maybe even jealous, hahaha...basta! I'd rrather have him dating someone, maybe Ron, hahahaha! But then Hermione wouldn't have Ron, so...ok, I take that back! lol Basta spare poor young Harry, hahaha...

That would be all for now...I am hoping to find a new blogskin to replace this one...I was feeling gloomy on the last one, so I changed...and now Therese and Bern said this one looked worse, so...change again, I suppose? ;P

another blastoff with bern

today was supposed to be normal

hah! with bechan? as if!

afternoon came and i had to go check on my brother's situation in UST admissions office

but then i got bored...the office people were out to lunch

and so I went to bern's house to visit her and also get the things i left there

we were supposed to see each other in DLSU, but she didn't come to school because her cell won't work and that means she wouldn't be able to contact me

after i expressed my displeasure over her skipping class, we stayed there for a while and then went off to UST to check my brother's situation

just 5 mins there and then we were off to SM San Lazaro for some lunch (brunch to me) at Max's and some window shopping (Bern wants some shirts)

she chose some gutsy shirts to wear and one statement shirt for Alloi

then we had our pic taken, 2 shots and four copies each for 50 bucks- a bargain

it was my first time to have a studio pic with someone outside the family...Bern had a way of impressing me with her creative ideas of fun...loads of it

later on we had to go back to Dapitan, ate some Chowking wanton and go home, met Mama, and then off to Tiff to get Bern's housekeys, which she left the other night

only Tiff was there- she had to go to Keith's grandma's party (whistle)...so she went through her wardrobe very selectively, which normally left a mountain of her clothes in the living room, hahahahaha!

now she left us watching Desperate Housewives again...loads of fun, that biatch of a show, hehehe...

and maybe l'll go home after this...man, the day went on fine fine fine...

except for the fact that I'm missing two people right now

Shuri

and Paulo

afternoon blast with bechan

Yesterday was a very special day for me. After cleaning up in English thesis biz with my groupmates I instantly headed off to DLSU to meet up with Bechan. I was hoping to see them all, as it was a monday, but then Pau and Bequa had gone home, and Jonreph's not answering my text, so whatever. But Bechan needed me there. And so I came.

Lunchtime at Taco Maker. Alloi was there, but she had to go later on. I was not counting on something hilarious for that visit, as Bech and I were talking about some very very serious matter.

But then I was wrong. Alloi left us with these kisses (you know, those new multicolored sugar-coated ones), which later on became the source of a new joke which we laughed on for about an hour until she had to leave me for her swimming PE at two.

For two hours she practiced and took her finals with Chammy. Chammy was even nice enough to come out and talk with me outside the gate. I had to sit there and wait for them to finish so that me and Bechan could go out. For the duration of my waiting I had to the chance to chit chat the guard, who at one point let me in because I had to go to the john. And we also ate corn at the last few minutes of our bonding time (as if...hahahaha).

Bechan came out and apologized, which I didn't need to hear anymore. I waited for her because I had wanted to. The guard said it so- that I did love my friends very very much, to wait for that long despite the fact that I am a person on the go who hates to wait for things to come.

So! We went to SM San Lazaro first. She bought me a wonderful book, which I have been wanting for the longest time. But that's only because I wasn't up to wasting my money on it (I'm very kuripot when it comes to my wants most of the time). And the funny thing is, she even borrowed my cash to pay for it for that time (later she paid for it naman- man...). I was feeling silly then, but I later on realized it was truly very very sweet of her.

After contacting my ma, we went to her place. But not before buying a bunch of pirated DVDs, and I must say I now understand why piracy has become such a booming industry in our country now, hehehe...

And because of all those kisses we ate during lunch, I had to use their CR, hahahaha...(later she followed after me, wehehehe)

We ate fried chicken for dinner and watched Just Friends. I had been wanting to watch that for a while. I really felt like that guy, the loser thang...and sometimes I want to run off somewhere where no one knows me, you know that feeling? It's mostly these people who do that to people who can't fight- or won't fight at all...condemning them because of skin-deep 'imperfections' when all they want to have is love and acceptance and true friendship all around...

OK! After the movie I had to go, but not before hanging on for a little more while to check mails, friendster accounts of other people...and borrow some of Bechan's books, which I hope might keep me busy (and sane) for a while.

And she took the liberty of taking me home. We walked all the way from escolta to quiapo, rode the taxi back to my neighborhood, Mendiola. It was funny when I realized Bern had the white SJ shirt on, and we're in front of SJ, hahaha!

As I had suspected earlier, ma wasn't home. So I went along with her, took her to Tiff's place to watch a bit of PBB and Desperate Housewives, which we all loved at once...depressing after some time of exposure, but cool comedy, too. (It's just a series with one big message to the girls: In order to be happy, make sure you're getting married to the right guy- or don't get married at all because they're all the same!)

I went off at twelve midnight, thought of what special day we had, reflected...and slept like a baby, hehehehe. I was touched with them being concerned with me walking at that time of the night- alone. Yes, I know I always maintained the deal that I am strong and I can handle myself, but it really touches me deeply whenever someone gives me the protective care instead. (But they wouldn't know of it now until they read this- right, Tiff, Bern, Therese? :) Love you, guys..)

I am very very happy and grateful for Bern giving me a share of her precious hours to help me fulfill my desire to lagalag for my last day. I felt happy that she was there for me, talked with me, sang for me...laughed out senseless things with me. As I always say, there are some things in this world more important that studying chemistry or pursuing a career...and one of them is having your friends around you to assure you you can do it!)